Legacy Statement Sample

Dear Josh and Andy,
It has been such a pleasure to be your father, and I am so proud of you both. I certainly hadn’t planned to leave you when I was 57 years old! But that’s what life has given us all. I just want write something for you as I exit the earth.

Being your father has been the most important single thing in my life. I’ve tried to be a good father to you both—and of course each of you needed a different father, so I have tried to adjust to you as I understood you and as you changed over the years.

I’ve always been on the lookout for opportunities for education and life experiences that would help you become the best versions of the unique individuals you are, and to allow you each to bring your substantial gifts into your world as adults.

But being a father is an imperfect science, and I know I have failed you many times. I am sorry for having not taken the time to truly understand you at times, and for having been too preoccupied with my own problems many times to give you what you really needed.

I didn’t do a great job at marriage, and I know you suffered from the ruptures of both my marriages. In retrospect I’ve decided that I just wasn’t cut out for marriage. I have been much happier since I’ve been living alone. But I want to apologize for the pain I caused you before I figured that out. And I hope that my failures at marriage won’t stop you from finding loving partners, if that’s what you want.

If you would permit me just one more “Dad talk” (or as Josh would say, “free lecture”) there are a few things I’d like to say:

Spend time in nature as much as you can. It will soothe you, fascinate you, uplift you. Take care of nature with your money, energy, and time.

Don’t let work become main event of your life. It’s so much less important than relationships and passions.

Be welcoming toward and try to understand the people in your life, and the people of the world. And yes, that includes even Republicans and the Religious Right.!

Cultivate friendships and maintain them as best you can. They will enrich your life and teach you most of what you really need to know..

Find a way to tune in to the sacred dimensions of life, however you can. Tune your inner antennae to wonder, joy, and mystery.

Continue to explore and understand more fully your essence and live that out. We have only one time around as far as I can tell, so why live it as somebody else?

I regret so much that I won’t be around to see you grow into your lives. That I won’t know the people you love, that I won’t get to meet any children you might have. You have taught me so much, and I am sad that I won’t be able to continue learning from you. You are such wonderful young men, with so much to give to the world.

I love you both so much,

Dad

Ethical Will Excerpt

I’m finishing this document on a sunny, warm day in August. Today is my 60th birthday. I have written it out of my need to put on paper something of my life and what I’ve learned from it, and in hopes that it will be of some benefit to those who read it. I hope it will offer guidance or affirmation to its readers. I also hope it will stimulate reflection, curiosity, and/or questioning. . . .

Money and power
You will have money and power, no matter what your station in life. You will use them, consciously or unconsciously, in the world around you. Remember that your money and power are in large measure given to you by where and to whom you were born and by your inborn abilities. In a profound way, they are not yours. I hope you will put effort into making the most of what has been given to you. I hope that you will be reflective about the difference between what you need and what you want, so that you will not be overly focused on material concerns to the detriment of your soul’s needs and others’ welfare. I also hope you will give thought to how you use your money and power for others.

I leave in your care the earth and all its waters, soil, rocks, air, and living creatures of all kinds. I hope you spend lots of time in nature, so that it can bring you the joy and peace it has brought me. And I hope that you will use your money and your power to do all you can to protect and nurture our natural world so that it will continue to sustain our life as humans and be a source of joy for future generations.

I also leave in your care those in need who have no voice: the poor; our world’s children; the mentally ill; the old; those who are abused, marginalized, or persecuted (including lesbian, gay, bisexual and differently gendered people); those falsely convicted; and victims of war. I hope that you will spend some of your money and power and time to help them. But more important, I hope you will work to change the unjust systems that perpetuate powerlessness and suffering. I have come to believe that injustice is the source of much of humanity’s suffering. If we are to survive as a human community on our beloved earth, it is critical that injustice be addressed continuously. Otherwise war and environmental degradation will destroy us all.

Peacemaking
This I offer you having lived most of my youth on the radical left in relation to politics and religion, and most of my subsequent years a little further in toward the middle. I hope that you will not be extreme either on the right or the left, the liberal or the conservative. That would keep you from seeing the whole, from hearing the points of view of everyone. It would cause you to write off the concerns of many people.

Our world is desperate for peace. It will come only if we can truly listen and gain understanding of everyone’s concerns, so that our actions lead to an enduring, humane, and just peace.

Mystery
In the past few years, I have come to the conclusion that at least 90% of life is a sacred mystery. It’s not the kind of mystery you try to solve, but the kind that gives you a sense of awe, wonder, and gratitude. Life is an encounter with the holy, and the holy works in mystery.

Nothing turns out the way you thought it would. No one is who you think they are, no matter how well you know them. Everything changes constantly in unpredictable ways, yet there is beauty and goodness and kindness and love in every moment. We see it seldom because we’re not paying attention. Yet the moments when we do see it—in the particular way light falls on a sheaf of wild grass, in someone’s smile, in a stranger’s kindness, in the glories of art, in the reflection of a sunset on a still pond—in those moments, we glimpse the sacred presence that reveals itself unsparingly and eternally. These moments are the moments we are most fully alive, and the moments we remember most vividly.